New Member

[James Clark]

[JosephRatliff]

James,

Both pages need a lot of work from a copywriting perspective. Headlines, readability, and use of ellipses all require some attention.

Go to http://www.copywritersboard.com for some tips, and some areas of this forum as well.

I like the simplicity in terms of color selection though, good job.

[jaggiegill]

Welcome to the SSWT forum James Clark, I hope you have a great time here.

Here are some tips to improve your websites, just like Joseph says , they need some attention and editing, I hope my lists helps you identify some problems.

Sales page:

1. It needs some serious editing!

2. Your sales copy is boring to be honest, give it some spice , hire a copywriter from a freelance website to help you out.

3. Add Proof, show people that you mean business, get some shots of your earnings ,m even for $9 I will not by this product unless I know you mean business, make your sales page more "in your face".

Squeeze Page:

1. You just don't have me sold, I read it and it's just another report, get some images in there and again, show the proof that it works!

Just spice up your information a little more, if you can show others this is a serious product, they will buy it.

[robert adams]

I have to agree, if you are selling expertise on copywriting, then your copywriting needs to show expertise.

welcome to the board. Dont be put off by our comments, you will get honest opinions here. Take what you need and use it to your advantage.

robert