Hi NALF, and welcome!
Here is a quote you may find beneficial. It's one of my favorites
"You may have a fresh start any moment you choose, for
this thing that we call 'failure' is not the falling
down, but the staying down." -- Mary Pickford.
Stick in there, read the posts on this forum, grab a copy of Google Cash if you don't already own a copy, and you'll do great!
Take care & all the best,